The Naruto Theme Song Machine: Individuals Edition
by WolfDancer
Summary: Songs for the characters chosen by the Theme Song Machine. Some make sense, others don't.


Title: The Naruto Theme Song Machine: Individuals Edition

Author: WolfDancer

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or any of the songs used in this fic. Thanks and enjoy!

_**THEPRETTYLINETOSEPERATESCENESTHEPRETTYLINETOSEPERATESCEN**_

Talking

_Thinking_

**Inner Sakura**

WolfDancer: (Adjusts her glasses) Hello everyone, my name is WolfDancer and this is my first Naruto fic. I have invented a Theme Song Machine. I enter a name it picks a song for you based on your personality. Now, I have brought the Naruto cast members here to give them theme songs.

Sasuke: This is stupid.

Naruto: My theme song will rock! Believe it!

Sakura and Ino: _Sasuke's theme song will be better!_

WolfDancer: Alright quiet! Ok first on the list is Team Kakashi. So let's begin with the team leader: Hatake Kakashi! (Goes up to the machine and types in 'Kakashi'.)

Machine: Theme Song Selected. Song: Hound Dog. Artist: Elvis Presley.

You ain't nothin but a hound dog  
Cryin all the time.  
You ain't nothin but a hound dog  
Cryin all the time.  
Well, you ain't never caught a rabbit  
And you ain't no friend of mine.

When they said you was high classed,  
Well, that was just a lie.  
When they said you was high classed,  
Well, that was just a lie.  
You ain't never caught a rabbit  
And you ain't no friend of mine.

WolfDancer: Any thoughts Kakashi?

Kakashi: Did you say something? (Goes back to reading Icha Icha Paradise)

WolfDancer: Uh… anyway next is the number one hyperactive knuckleheaded ninja Uzumaki Naruto! (Types 'Naruto' into the machine)

Machine: Theme Song Selected. Song: I'm Gonna Be Somebody. Artist: Travis Tritt

Bobby played his guitar on the hard side of town  
Where it's hard for a poor boy to find the money  
He had dedication, he had the heart and soul  
Somehow knew he was born to play

They said get a real job support your family  
Cause there's no future on the road your takin'  
But he never said a word, the dreamer just kept on  
Late at night you could hear him sing

I'm gonna be somebody, one of these days I'm gonna break these chains  
I'm gonna be somebody, someday, you can bet your hard earned dollar I will

Bobby played his hometown, one full moon August night  
He heard a voice out in the front row  
It's a sandy-haired Texas boy with same ole hungry eyes  
Looked up at Bobby and said

I'm gonna be somebody, one of these days I'm gonna break these chains  
I'm gonna be somebody, someday, you can bet your hard earned dollar I will

You can bet your hard earned dollar I will

WolfDancer: Well Naruto? What'd you think?

Naruto: That rocked! It totally suits me! Believe it!

WolfDancer: Cool. Anyway who's next?

Sakura: Sasuke can go if he wants.

Sasuke: I don't care.

WolfDancer: Next is Haruno Sakura! (Enters 'Sakura' into the machine while Sakura shouts about Sasuke going next)

Machine: Theme Song Selected. Song: Icky Vicky. Artist: The Fairly Odd Parents.

V-I-CKY

The sound of her name makes the little kids cry (AHHHHHHH)

Hey Vicky you're so so icky

Just the thought of being around you makes me oh so sicky

Hey Vicky won't you please explain why

you get so much enjoyment out of causing kids pain

(OH OH OH!)

A chick who's just plain mean

A sour sweet 16

She's a fire breathing dragon

in a pair of black jeans (EEEEWWWW)

AHOOOOOOO

Hey Vicky won't you tell us true

how'd we ever get the bad luck to be stuck with you

Oh Vicky can we say one thing

It's your super total yuckiness

that makes us wanna sing

OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH!

Icky Vicky ooo ooo

Icky Vicky ooo ooo

ICKY VICKY!

Sakura: That's a horrible theme song and my name isn't Vicky!

WolfDancer: Oh, well the message is there.

Sakura: What do you mean by that?!?!

WolfDancer: Nothing, nothing. Anyway last in team Kakashi is the Emo Uchiha Sasuke. (Enters 'Sasuke' into the machine)

Machine: Theme Song Selected. Song: Then What? Artist: Clay Walker.

I'm an emo kid, non-conforming as can be.  
You'd be non-conforming too if you looked just like me  
I have paint on my nails and ma-

WolfDancer: (Pushes a button on the machine) Oops. How'd that get in there? (Pushes another button)

Machine: You! I wanna take you to a gay bar-

WolfDancer: (Pushes several more buttons) Just give me a minute…

Machine:

Well I got a good friend who's got a good life  
He's got two pretty children and a real nice wife  
But he never seems quite satisfied  
I said I know what's on your mind  
But you better think about it before you cross that line  
The grass ain't always greener on the other side

Then what, what you gonna do  
When the new wears off and the old shines through  
And it ain't really love and it ain't really lust  
You ain't anybody anyone's gonna trust  
Then what, where you gonna turn  
When you cant turn back for the bridges you burn  
And fate can't wait to kick you in the butt  
Then what

Well I ain't saying that looking's a crime  
Well I've done my share from time to time  
It don't mean that you gotta take that leap  
When you're standin' on the brink  
Before you jump you gotta step back and think  
There's price for ever promise you don't keep

Then what, what you gonna do  
When the new wears off and the old shines through  
And it ain't really love and it ain't really lust  
You ain't anybody anyone's gonna trust  
Then what, where you gonna turn  
When you cant turn back for the bridges you burn  
And fate can't wait to kick you in the butt  
Then what

Do want you want, do want you wish  
It's your life but remember this  
There's bound to be some consequences  
Sneaking under other fences

Then what, what you gonna do  
When the new wears off and the old shines through  
And it ain't really love and it ain't really lust  
You ain't anybody anyone's gonna trust  
Then what, where you gonna turn  
When you cant turn back for the bridges you burn  
And fate can't wait to kick you in the butt  
Then what

WolfDancer: So any thoughts Sasuke?

Sasuke: You made it play those songs on purpose didn't you?

WolfDancer: Of course not. Now why would I ever do such a thing? (I love sarcasm)

Sasuke: Whatever. It was stupid. That song doesn't even relate to me at all.

WolfDancer: Yeah right… (Sarcasm again) All right! That's the end of the first chapter and the chapter for Team Kakashi! (Applause) So in chapter two the team will be… (Opens an envelope with a drum roll in the background) Team Asuma! See you then! Bye everyone!

_**THEPRETTYLINETOSEPERATESCENESTHEPRETTYLINETOSEPERATESCEN**_

The two excerpts before Sasuke's real song were from:

Emo Kid. By: Adam and Andrew.

Gay Bar. By: Electric Six.

Thanks and review if you wish!

Peace Out! WolfDancer


End file.
